Techno-Quaresma!

Hello, one and all! As November looms before me, I face it with a goal never before attempted, at least not since I was in Brazil. The longest record of doing this particular goal was 24 months. This one month should not only be easy, but I'm certain it will benefit me in many ways.

Life is full of distractions nowadays. I got online Saturday to watch a YouTube video while I was eating my nachos, and next thing I know, I've gone from six meaningless and stupid YouTube videos to TVTropes.org (which is fun, but also time-consuming), to look at Facebook pictures of people I don't even know anymore. And an hour and a half has passed by, which I could have used to get my work done and earn money, or get homework done to take a load off later. Heck, I could have read a book, for crap's sake!

This kind of time-wasting is not healthy, and it annoyed me that it had snagged me so easily. They say idle hands are the devil's tools, and I don't want to work for that butthead! One of the most valuable things to us is, I think, self-control. If we don't have control over ourselves, it's like someone putting a ring in our nose and leading us around. Well, I don't know about you, but I don't want no ring in my nose. So my solution/exercise for my self control is...

The November Techno-Quaresma!

The rules I must abide by are as follows: 

1. No Facebook during the month of November.

I found a nifty program that can block any website you want, so this is one of the three websites I'm going to block this month. I'm also going to disable my text notifications. (My email notifications have long been disabled.) However, I will be able to post witty status updates via text. I just won't be able to see any comments on them.

 2. No YouTube during the month of November.

This site will be completely blocked on my laptop. If someone wants to show me something funny, they can show me. I just won't be allowed to access the site on my own computer. This rule alone will save me hours of collective time in one week, I'm sure.

 3. No TVTropes during the month of November.

I don't have that much of a problem with this site, but I'm going to block it anyway. As with all Wikis, one cool page has a link to 30 other cool pages, and... yeah. Pretty soon the day's over.

4. No bringing my laptop when I'm not going to use it.

I'm not sure how well I'll be able to keep this rule, but it's an important one. I used to pull out a book and read while I was waiting for class to start. Now I just pull out my laptop and.... push buttons on my laptop.

5. No computer games of any kind to be played on my laptop.

This includes creative games and map editors, which are probably worse for me than regular games. I will be able to play video games with my friends if that's the activity of the week or whatever. I consider gaming a social pastime when it's with friends. My goal is to ultimately eliminate gaming alone. This can get carried away and waste literally hours of time.

6. Thanksgiving Day is the only exception to above rules.

My wife is addressing a weakness of her own this month, namely eating sweets. She will not be allowed to eat any sweets in November, excepting this same rule, on Thanksgiving Day. Cuz punkin pie only comes once or twice a year, you know. And you know, family together and whatnot may bring some video games in to the picture.

Okay, so it's not literally a fast from technology. I still have homework to do on the computer, and movies (and of course this blog) are completely free game. It's more a fast from wasting time. Those social programs are literally chains that have been weighing down on me. I don't mean that to sound preachy in any way, but I admire those people who don't even have a Facebook profile, or who don't even play video games... who go outside and invent fun every day, or who are involved in organizations and clubs. In the course of this month, I hope to be able to:

• Read at least a book or two
• Take more time to be religious
• Write or work on non-computer related projects
• Get involved in something on campus... perhaps Capoeira, or a writer's workshop
• Stay completely on top of my homework and job
• More worthwhile jazz!

My secret hope is to eliminate these things entirely. Sure, Facebook can be something I look at maybe once a month or something, but free time is something precious now, and I shouldn't be a-wastin' it on things that don't matter.

Wish me luck. My month begins Tuesday, November 1, 2011, at 12:00 AM Mountain Standard Time. It will end temporarily Thanksgiving day at the same time and resume 24 hours afterward. It will officially end on December 1, 2011 at midnight. But I hope by then I'll have the self-control to extend it.

The Magic of Disney

My wife and I had the chance to go to Walt Disney World a couple of weeks ago. I hadn't gone since 9th Grade, and my wife Karen hadn't gone at all. Going to Disney World as an adult is a different experience than it is as a kid, but its grandeur and overall fun wasn't diminished. I daresay, in fact, it was enhanced now that I'm old enough to look at it in a deeper and more appreciative light.

I loved the different parks; we got to go to the four main ones—Magic Kingdom, Epcot, Animal Kingdom and Hollywood Studios—and each had a magnificent and artfully designed layout, with rides fitting the various Disney titles. I've loved Space Mountain since I was a kid. I could go on it over and over again. Fortunately for us, it was the perfect time of year for lines. School had just started for all the kids, and we got to go on all our favorite rides twice. In Space Mountain's case we went three times.

Each ride at Disney World is a masterpiece. From the queue line to the pre-ride storyline to the ride itself and even the cast members operating it, the moment you step on you feel like you've gone into a different world. On the Tower of Terror at Hollywood Studios,  for example, the ride appears to be an immense, old-fashioned hotel. From outside you can see the hotel's neon sign, partially obscured by a charred lightning strike, and flickering ominously. The queue line on the outside is decorated around by overgrown hedges, and on the inside appears to be a snapshot into the lobby of a 1930's hotel lobby, wreathed in cobwebs. Before the ride is a brief synopsis of an accident that supposedly happened in the hotel years earlier that left the elevators damaged and dangerous, delivered by The Twilight Zone's Rod Serling through a television set seemingly powered by its own accord. The line continues into the dank boiler room of the hotel, where you board an old-fashioned elevator. The cast members are dressed in perfect 1930's bellhop costumes, and as you board the elevator they say something like "This elevator will take you up to your room... your bags will be up shortly. If you need anything, just scream."

The ride afterwards uses a masterful presentation of Pepper's Ghost images, sound effects and animatronics, and then of course is the intense dropping and bouncing of the elevator itself. After the ride, you exit through the gift shop, still keeping the "cobwebbed, ancient hotel" motif.

I was impressed with every ride I went on. Disney doesn't just make sure their rides are a top-notch experience. I was impressed at how clean the parks were; I found that the park staff (called "cast members") were for the most part agreeable and friendly, clean-cut, and professional in dress and appearance. I didn't see any with a beard or a tattoo. They made sure to appear approachable and helpful.

At the end of each day at a park, the park had a special presentation with fireworks and lights. They were all not only spectacular, but inspiring. They talked about the things that the Disney movies taught us as kids—that big things start with a tiny wish, that we're all human beings, and the power of our imagination. In the Magic Kingdom presentation, my wife started to get emotional and cry. She was embarassed about it, but I told her "Karen, look around you. There are grown men here with Mickey Mouse ears on." Everyone goes to Disney World because it makes you feel like a kid. Stepping into the park seems to erase any problems you had with hugging giant Disney characters you know are just costumes with strangers inside of them, or riding a ride based on a kids' movie.

I am certain that Walt Disney must be going to a good place in the Hereafter. His morals were posted around the park. "If you can dream it, you can do it," and "The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.” The Disney parks around the world are an example of what can be done with teamwork, imagination, and perseverance. All of these things combined beautifully to literally make a new world, and an experience that was, for my wife and me, a blissful escape from reality.

Recipe #2: Synergy Flameburgers

I'm a big burger fan. Besides steak and a baked potato, there's almost nothing I crave more often. I've eaten burgers with a vast variety of toppings; fried eggs, shredded chicken, onion rings, and even corn. This is the most delicious burger I've been able to invent at home; I took ideas from Five Guys, A&W, and perhaps others.

Synergy Flameburgers

"The whole is tastier than the sum of the parts!"

 Ingredients

• Toasted sesame seed buns
• Beef hamburger patties
• Sliced, jarred Jalapeño peppers
• 2 strips bacon
• Lettuce
• Pickles (hamburger chips are best)
• Ranch dressing
• A-1 steak sauce
• Medium cheddar cheese
• Mayonnaise
• Onions

Directions

1. Fry the bacon, drain most of the grease, then sautté the onions in the remaining drippings.
2. Season the patty(ies) with seasoning salt and lemon pepper. Grill until desired doneness(Yes, that's a word). Place slice of cheddar cheese on each burger to melt.
3. Spread mayonnaise on the buns. Put a small amount of A-1 steak sauce on the underside of the hamburger patty.
4. Arrange the burger and toppings in the following order:
1. Jalapeños
2. Onions
3. Patty (and cheese)
4. Bacon
5. Pickles
6. Ranch
7. Lettuce
5. Serve with seasoned potato wedges. Comment on this blog with your opinion.

YIELD: 1 burger per bun/patty combo. For a heartier, meatier meal, add TWO patties!

Washes down well with...  Pop, soda, or soft drink. All are great.

Austin vs. Monotony: Summer Review

This past summer I mowed lawns for my job. It was perhaps the fifth year (nonconsecutive) that I had this seasonal occupation, and as usual I made an effort to make each monotonous day unique somehow. There's only so much difference you can do at a job where you merely sit on a mower all day and eat between properties. I threw random ingredients on my sandwiches (I discovered that ground peppercorns are good on meat sandwiches. Sweet pickles are good on turkey), but that's about the only customizable lunch component there is. The only thing that's really customizable in mowing is the part that takes up 80% of the day: what you direct your thoughts to.

In years past, (I'm not sure how) I mowed with no headphones, or even earplugs in; I preferred to be alone all day with my adolescent thoughts of video games and girls. It is indeed a great job for thinking; Perhaps in fact, the ideal. Mowing without music, in little time the drone of the mower beneath fades away to thoughts and plans for... correct. Projects! A few days this summer I preferred this way of doing things. But more than once a month or so is torture. I'm not sure how I mowed with no ear protection at all, though. Some of those machines are loud.

My system changed when last year I got an iPod, and was able to make good use of it throughout the day.
The problem is, my interest in music is extremely limited. I only had about 40 or 50 songs, which made for a boring, repetitive week. Some long days I could listen to the entire playlist; other days I would come home and delete ear-worms that I realized weren't meant to be listened to more than once a week.

My brother (whom I worked with) and I loved to listen to the radio morning show as we traveled to the different properties. In time our favorite station, Z-103, made a podcast of their morning show. This was a great way to spend time mowing, listening to jokes and trivia all day. I remember several moments of my own busted-up laughter in the middle of a baseball field, drowned by the roar of the mowing engine.

This year, however, the station downsized their podcasts to update only once a week instead of daily. What was I to do now? I can't remember what gave me the idea, but I decided to look around the Web for old radio shows to listen to. In little time I discovered Relic Radio, an archived old radio podcast with old shows from the 40's to the 60's. They had categories such as Science Fiction (my favorite broadcasters were X-1 and Dimension X), Comedy (The Mel Blanc Show), Crime Cases (Your Truly Johnny Dollar and The Saint), and Horror (I didn't like any I listened to). It was amazing to listen to ancient air-waves on my iPod (complete with commercials!); stuff that my grandparents probably listened to. I gained a genuine respect for the entertainment of older times. It was fun for me to experience the stories they displayed in a unique way. There were no visuals, no special effects. Only excellent voice actors and sound effects to illustrate the stories. They were a great way to spend my time.

When the sameness of the science-fiction plots got old, and I got tired of hearing "Golly gee!" and "Hey, put that gun down, Marty", I looked for other things to listen to. There was still a fair amount of summer left. I got the idea from browsing on iTunes to look for audiobooks. Unfortunately, to access the biggest scope of audiobooks, simply buying one, meant I'd need to fork out at least $40 a book. Thank goodness for public libraries! I found and listened to The Hobbit first, and enjoyed the experience. It brought me back to fond memories of 4th Grade, when Miss Baird would sit down with us after lunch and simply read to us. After that I listened to the Hunger Games trilogy, and then the entire Harry Potter series. I finished up the summer by listening to six books of my favorite book series, Discworld. I was amazed at the talent of the audiobook readers. They always managed to find as many different voices as there were characters in the books. In little time, I forgot that one person was telling the story, and felt myself completely immersed in the stories.

In short, I discovered this summer that there are many things to listen to that are products of nothing but pure talent. The instrumental and vocal stylings of singers, the comedic humor of radio DJ's, the classic and sometimes obsolete media of the past, and voice actors reading brilliant literature.
And the best part was, I got paid by the hour to enjoy good entertainment!

In Loving Memory

I retired my work shoes today, that I've used for two or three full summers of work. That's a lot of mowing!

Farewell, work shoes. I'm certain the grass is greener on the Other Side.

Theater #2: Mold

Charlie. Rachel, do you realize what you ate just now?

Rachel. [Slowly] Yes… It was the casserole I made on Thursday.

Charlie. Sorry to break it to you, but I saw some blue mold on it yesterday. Fuzzy like a sock.

Rachel. Whatever. I would have seen it before I’d have eaten it, thank you very much.

Charlie. Well… the sight was so hideous I turned the square of casserole over with a spatula.

Rachel. Urk…

Charlie. Yes, I see you remember. It was upside-down, was it not?

Rachel. [Gags]

Charlie. Now don’t you go bulimic on me!

Favicon!

Hey all, you should look at the Pretzel Lectern on your favorites list! (I hope it's there) I had no idea what a "favicon" was, but it turned out to be something I had been looking for. Now it added its own little personality to my blog and makes it easier to find than a little "B" on an orange square. Just like all the other blogs.

Some stuff is coming soon! Just been busy between transitions. Work/School, Work/Disney World vacation... you know how it is.