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Dec 13, 2019

Warcraft Techno (The German Mixes)



I like techno a lot, but I really liked it back in 2007 when I first started college. Somewhere around that time, I found this song by "Mr. Tom & Got Show," whom I can't find much information about anywhere online. Since I've been playing Warcraft 2 lately, I was reminded of this song and now it's finally published for public consumption!

At the time, I thought that it was independently created and voiced to mimic the voice lines on Warcraft 2 in German (There's a line from the ogre, "Er wars! Nein, er wars," that sounds like "You da boss" from the troll), but now that it's 12 years later and I found a very thorough translator to take a listen to it (thanks a lot YouTuber Watthe), it turns out that all the lines are taken straight from the German dub of the game, and that there are some interesting facts about them. Below are some of my favorites.
  1. The German version says "manchmal kann man noch das Heulen ihrer gequälten Seelen mit den Windpfeifen hören," which in English is simply "the howling of their tortured souls fill the air," but this literally translates to "one can hear the howling of their tortured souls through windpipes."
  2. The German line "Solltest du verlieren, ist das dein Ende. Ahh ha ha ha haa haa!" is the last line of the final orc campaign mission in Beyond the Dark Portal. The laugh was added in by the German voice actor and is not in the English version, which says "Fail or be slaughtered" instead of "Should you fail, that is your end."
  3. Some of the units have different lines in German; for example, the knight says "So geht das nicht weiter," which means "You can't keep doing this / This has to stop." And one of the orc units says "You look like a human!" These are all "annoyed" quotes when you click on a unit multiple times.
  4. Some lines are erroneously literally transcribed into German. The knight says "Ich brauche Order," which means "I need orders," but the German word for "orders" should be "Befehle."
  5. In English, the briefing says "Destroy the renegade clans and bring back the head of Gul'dan," but the German version says "bestrafe Gul'dan," which means "punish Gul'dan."

Dec 6, 2019

10 D&D Monster Templates

I've found that one of the best ways to breathe new life into the creativity of homebrew monster encounters in Dungeons & Dragons is through templates. Who could be more unique than encountering a fairy lich, a pack of zombie dogs, a half-dragon half-ogre, or a dire snail? I did some research and compared and compiled some stuff in the monster manual, and have for you some templates you can give to any monster. In order to apply one of these templates, simply change anything explained in the bullet points. Everything else (except the appearance of the monster, which is up to you to make unique!) remains the same.

Dire

  • +1 size category (and +1 Hit Die size)
  • +5 Strength, +3 Constitution, +1 Charisma
  • +1 damage die size

Half-dragon

  • 10 feet of blindsight, +60 feet of darkvision
  • Resistance to acid, lightning, fire, poison, or cold, depending on the draconic parent
  • Knows and speaks Draconic
  • Action: Breath Weapon. The half-dragon has the breath weapon of its dragon half. Generally, it has a wyrmling breath attack, but Huge half-dragons have as a young dragon’s and Gargantuan half-dragons have as an adult dragon's

Ghostly

  • Undead type
  • Walking speed of 0 feet, flying (hover) speed of 40 feet
  • Resistance to acid, cold, fire, lightning, thunder; and bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing damage from nonmagical attacks
  • Immunity to necrotic damage and poison
  • Immune to being charmed, exhausted, grappled, paralyzed, petrified, poisoned, prone, and restrained.
  • Incorporeal Movement. The ghost can move through other creatures and objects as if they were difficult terrain. It takes 1d10 force damage if it ends its turn inside and object.
  • Undead Nature. Doesn’t require air, food, drink, or sleep

Golem

  • Constitution 20 (+5), Intelligence 3 (-4), Charisma 1 (-5)
  • Unaligned
  • Immune to poison and psychic damage, nonmagical attacks that aren’t adamantine
  • Immune to charming, exhaustion, fright, paralysis, petrification, and poison
  • 60 feet of darkvision
  • Armor Class equal to material hardness (14 clay, 17 stone, 20 iron, etc.)
  • Immutable Form. Immune to spells or effects that alter its form.
  • Magic Resistance. Advantage on saving throws against magic
  • Magic Weapons. Magical weapon attacks.
  • Constructed Nature. A golem doesn’t require air, food, drink, or sleep.

Lycanthrope

  • Shapechanger tag
  • Immunity to bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing damage from nonmagical, unsilvered weapons
  • Werebear
    • Strength 19(+4)
    • Neutral good alignment
    • +1 AC (natural armor)
    • Keen Smell.  The lycanthrope has advantage on Wisdom (Perception) checks that rely on smell.
  • Wereboar
    • Strength 17(+3)
    • Neutral evil alignment
    • +1 AC (natural armor)
    • Charge. If the wereboar moves at least 15 feet straight toward a target and then hits it with its tusks on the same turn, the target takes an extra 7 (2d6) slashing damage. If the target is a creature, it must succeed on a DC 13 Strength saving throw or be knocked prone.
  • Wererat
    • Dexterity 15(+2)
    • Lawful evil alignment
    • Keen Smell.  The lycanthrope has advantage on Wisdom (Perception) checks that rely on smell.
  • Weretiger
    • Strength 17(+3)
    • Neutral alignment
    • Keen Hearing and Smell.  The lycanthrope has advantage on Wisdom (Perception) checks that rely on hearing or smell.
    • Pounce. If the weretiger moves at least 15 feet straight toward a creature and then hits it with a claw attack on the same turn, that target must succeed on a DC 14 Strength saving throw or be knocked prone. If the target is prone, the weretiger can make one bite attack against it as a bonus action.
  • Werewolf
    • Strength 15(+2)
    • Chaotic evil alignment
    • +1 AC (natural armor)
    • Keen Hearing and Smell.  The lycanthrope has advantage on Wisdom (Perception) checks that rely on hearing or smell.

Spore Servant

  • Plant type
  • Unaligned
  • Intelligence 2(-4), Wisdom 6(-2), and Charisma 1(-5)
  • Speed reduced by 10 feet (minimum 5)
  • 30 feet of blindsight (blind beyond this radius)
  • Immune to blinding, charming, fear, and paralysis
  • Loses saving throw and skill bonuses, special senses, special traits, languages, all actions except weapon attacks.

Skeletal

  • Undead type
  • Lawful evil alignment
  • Charisma 5(-3), Intelligence 6(-2), and Wisdom 8(-1)
  • Vulnerability to bludgeoning damage
  • Immunity to poison and exhaustion
  • 60 feet of darkvision
  • Understands all languages it knew in life but can’t speak
  • Undead Nature. Doesn’t require air, food, drink, or sleep

Wooden

  • Plant type
  • Vulnerability to fire damage
  • Resistance to bludgeoning and piercing damage
  • AC 16 (natural armor)

Vampire

  • Lawful evil alignment
  • Strength, Constitution, and Dexterity 18(+4)
  • 120 feet of darkvision
  • Resistance to necrotic damage; and bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing damage from nonmagical attacks.
  • All vampire traits and actions (See the Monster Manual)

Zombie

  • Undead
  • Neutral evil alignment
  • Charisma 5(-3), Dexterity 6(-2), Intelligence 3(-2), Wisdom 6(-2)
  • +2 Constitution
  • -10 feet movement speed
  • Immunity to poison
  • 60 feet of darkvision
  • Understands all languages it knew in life but can’t speak
  • Proficient in Wisdom saving throws
  • Undead Nature. Doesn’t require air, food, drink, or sleep
  • Undead Fortitude. If damage reduces the zombie to 0 hit points, it must make a Constitution saving throw with a DC of 5 + the damage taken, unless the damage is radiant or from a critical hit. On a success, the zombie drops to 1 hit point instead.