Relic Project: "Guide"/Legends of Mynn 1: Characters

Alright, something to know about me if you didn't already: I love games. I always have. I always grew up thinking I'd be a video game designer in the future, and I wasted no time in my childhood investing in that future. I would draw screenshots of games I was going to make, complete with UI. I would write Warcraft II-style manuals for games, describing units and abilities and everything without even designing the game first. And then, there were projects like this.

It's a .txt file simply called "Guide," and apparently it's a walkthrough / README for a game I was going to make someday. The date stamp of the file is 2006, which is unfortunate, because that must have been either when I accidentally updated it or moved it from one computer to another and the original date got overwritten, because I wrote it much earlier—I'm guessing around 2000 or 2001. Maybe earlier though.

I'm so glad it's survived up to this point, though. It's such an interesting look at my early child game designer mind. I remember picturing the characters in my head and how they would look (of course in pixely graphics because that's just what I thought computer graphics looked like by definition), but not so much how the game worked, as you'll see in its descriptions. I know it seems to have been inspired by some aspects of Lords of Magic, but the way combat is described in the walkthrough and moves list are confusing.

It's funny how thorough I am in every aspect of it, though I neglected to come up with an actual title for the game. Though some parts are impressive, it's clear that I had no idea how games were created. It's cute how I even came up with cheat codes for it and descriptions for how to use the "Level Editor." I always loved when games came with editors.

Anyway, presenting "Guide," or "Legends of Mynn" or whatever it might have ended up to be. I've restructured things for easier reading here to get a better idea of how I intended it to be red, but I've preserved the wording for the most part. Today I'll just highlight the characters in the game.

Dubbing Differences: The Little Mermaid

 

Calories Must Die! The Warmage Workout

I've been wanting to get into shape for some time, especially with being stuck working from home because of COVID, so I bought a couple of 10-pound weights and started following a workout video on YouTube. The video was great for beginners, and it followed a great balance of working out each muscle group. The problem was, the video got old. I'm not interested in hollow encouragement and banter, and I could only stand hearing the coach crack the same joke so many times before getting in shape just wasn't worth it. So I got an idea.

What does interest me? Video games. What gets my blood pumping? The video game Orcs Must Die! Whose voice don't I get tired of? The main character on the game, the Warmage, as he goes through killing orcs! So I spent way too many hours rotoscoping the coach of that workout video into the Warmage, adding exciting, blood-pumping music and the Warmage's banter to the video, and pronto! An almost too-perfect video for myself to work out to on a consistent basis. Seriously, how perfect is it that the songs have ending stings so I could customize the length of each workout, and that each sound effect has a place in the video?

I'm also fairly impressed with how I doctored the logo and stuff with special effects, if I do say so myself. Anyway, I do this workout three times a week, and it's mainly made for my own use, but feel free to follow it as well! I was hoping Robot Entertainment would get a kick out of it, since it almost seems like something they would actually make, but no dice. Oh well. It was fun to make and it does its job well!